Today in church we sang this praise song, one line goes, "I am hungry, I am hungry, I am hungry for more of you. I am thirsty, Oh Jesus, I am thirsty for more of you."
And I stood there thinking.
It is really hard to sing this song here.
I think I would understand it, really mean it if i was hungry or thirsty.
But in reality, I can't remember the last time I was truly hungry or thirsty.
In fact, I had some coffee that my church provided, all steamy and warm and I could have had a fatty doughnut that I really didn't need (but I was super spiritual and passed on it). How are we to really hunger and thirst after God if we are so filled up and have no need of Him?
I stood there thinking, I don't really feel like I can sing this... but I better because people will wonder what is up with me.
Where it all broke down for me was that I realized at our 9 am service that is was about 7 pm in Uganda... dinner time, bed time. I began to think. I am not hungry, but what if our boys are? Are they going to bed with a growling tummy? Did our baby get formula today? In my gut I doubt it, in my heart I hope so.
This adoption thing isn't all about "do-gooding" it is God's means of making me more like His Son. It is about being aware of what our true brothers and sisters are dealing with. It is about associating ourselves less with people that look like us, talk like us and live like us, and more about associating ourselves with the notion that our society, bank account or goals are like rubbish before the throne of God.
I am thankful for my clean home, healthy children, and full pantry... but I rely on that far more than I rely on God. That is sin, plain and simple!
A friend of ours in currently in Uganda and wrote this post...
very eye opening and humbling.