Saturday, May 28, 2011

Two Types of Women

One thing I've become more and more aware of the longer I have lived is that there is something that often happens in women's lives that makes them either "Fussy Bitter Ladies" or "Glowing Ladies".

Do you see it too?

You know, you are sitting in church and an older lady walks in. First you notice how dolled up she is, totally ok, but then you notice how when her husband sits down next to her and lovingly wraps his arm around her she gets all fussy and scolds him about messing her hair. Then during greeting time you get it... "Oh honey, you sure do have your hands full!" You respond with the only remark that make sense at the time, for me, "Yes, but so is my heart." She doesn't get the drift and continues, "Well, you think it is all fun now, but wait until they are teenagers! Well, I should know, I had 2 and I nearly killed them both before they were grown! Oh they broke my heart! Now, both boys are married and OH their wives! Daughter's in-law, wouldn't wish them on any one!" And it continues... on and on and on.

I really don't know what to do with women like that. I want to be compassionate, understanding, and try to see life through their shoes... also respect them as they are older women. BUT I also wonder why they feel the way they do, AND... how do I avoid morphing into one of them.

Really, that is one of the BIGGER concerns in my life. No, seriously. I think my worst fear, as of date, is that I will stop looking at my life as the creation GOD intends it to be, with struggles, hardships and difficulties and start being bitter, jaded and irritated about every minor inconvenience that crosses my path.

I've had those moments...

When my kitchen sink water daily scalds my hand... do I have a pity party about it, or praise God for the abundant hot water? I am tempted to be pitiful.

When my children are little ingrates do I say, "Oh woe is me... I should have listened to the world and worked at a job that "really matters?" I am tempted to be irritated.

When my husband sloppily puts his big arms around me do I act like a priss and get all in a humpf about my hair? I am more than tempted to be fussy.

It is totally a possibility I could be that woman!

Then there are a few women (very few) that seem to fit into an entirely different description. I don't know enough of them, well enough, to really know what makes them up. Isn't that sad. But what I see in them is this... peace, faith, perspective and love...

They are the type to say, "Oh, I bet you are busy! But don't think for one moment it isn't worth it! It is! Your children are a lot of work now, but in a few years your work will pay off and you'll have SO much fun with them."

They still look in love with their spouse. They don't mind if his big hands squeeze theirs too tightly or their hair gets out of whack at church.

They look young in their eyes, even if their hair is white and they look at children with a glimmer of mischief, love and thankfulness.

They seem to realize that "this" (life and the world) isn't about them, their happiness or feelings.

When I see "Glowing" women it is just about all I can do to not stop them and say something like, "How did you live life and still end up like that? You look so happy..."

BUT I already know in my heart what makes a woman a Fusser and what makes them a Glower... Its the Gospel... the REAL one.

1. Knowing who you are created to be... A person that can participate in being a reflection of God's glory.
2. Knowing who God is (really is)... choosing to experience Him... his peace in hard things, his presence when you are all alone, and his joy when it just doesn't make sense.
3. Choosing to view your life as not your own... participate fully in the plan God has for your life.
4. Dying to self and living in Christ.

"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

Titus 2:3-5

Does any one else fear becoming "that kind of lady"?

I've got a good story to tell later, but I don't think it would make sense with out these thoughts...

1 comment:

Julianna said...

I do. I have always look at women even before I became one. I was trying to figure out what made the beautiful ones beautiful. You are right it is the gospel lived out in their life. What I saw in them is Jesus.