Thursday, October 20, 2011

Why Marriage Makes Sense

How did my husband know?
I never can tell.
But he always, always knows when my heart is troubled.
And he usually always knows what I need in those moments to make it "all better"

Last night, I went to bed. My thoughts were centered on six days in the future... court.
What would I say if asked "this?" How should I respond if told "that?"
My mind was reeling, unable to sleep. Anxious.

Then he said, "Why are you so worried?"
I crying immediately. Hot tears that are as heavy as my heart.

I admitted my fear like a five year old afraid of going to the doctor.
Going is needed, even good, and totally unavoidable.
But it is exposing... uncertain... overwhelming and I thought... all dependent upon me.

My man says it isn't all dependent on me.
I know that.
But I like to think it is.

My man says that I need to remember what I've always known.
I know that.
But I forget it.

My man tells me he loves me.
I know that.
But I like to be told again.

Then he puts on a song we listened to in college, when everything was uncertain, we didn't have a clue what the future would hold or how we'd make it all happen the way we thought it was suppose to.
And it all made sense again.

And I realized two things. I need God's peace, presence and power just as much as I did a year ago.
The peace I need now. So I can get some sleep. My worry won't change a thing. But peace might.

And, I know exactly why God made me Mrs. Tim Miller... because we need each other to understand Him better.

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